Wandering and Wondering

I do not want to sound like one of those old people who talk about the good old days. Until recently I did not feel the past was better than today. I marvel at the transformations that have occurred in my lifetime. I am in awe of what has emerged in the past 75 years.

I am particularly aware of the changes in technology. My childhood had three channels on a black and white TV with rabbit ears. It went off the air every night with the playing of the national anthem. In high school I was excited to have a little transistor radio that I listened to at night with favorite songs that only aired from time to time. I took a typing class in high school in preparation for college and remember us students begging to take turns using the only electric typewriter that we had.

Technology that really changed my life was the invention of email and the world wide web. I recall reading Future Shock in the mid-70’s and fantasizing about the possibilities someday or having information instantaneously available at one’s fingertips rather than having to consult an encyclopedia or get help from a librarian. Who would have believed that we would be carrying unlimited information in our pockets every day.

I have also witnessed the revolutions in healthcare over the years. In 1950, the average life expectancy was 46 years; in 2023 it is 73 years. I have benefited from vaccines that have become available to save lives. I remember especially the joy that my mom expressed when polio vaccine became available when I was in grade school.

The political environment has greatly interested me. Seeing TV clips of the civil rights movement were perplexing to me as a child who was growing up in an exclusively white community. I recall the concerns of nuclear war related to aspects such as the Cuban missile crisis. My parents built a “fall-out” shelter in our basement just in case nuclear war happened. Little did I know how futile that shelter activity was.

The Vietnam War was central to my high school and college years. As time went on, I became jaded by the ability of any war to solve problems. I continue to seek understanding of how diplomacy is better than war. Until the past year, I believed that I grew up and lived in an international order that sought peace, stability, and growth.

I could go on with my perspectives on other major changes. I will, however, leave it here as I contemplate what may happen in 2026 that will significantly impact my life and the lives of people I love as well as those individuals I do not know.

I love my family of origin. My biological family shaped my core values and beliefs. I miss my parents and strive to maintain connections with my sisters. I am grateful, however, for the families of choice that have emerged over the years. These networks of friends and colleagues offer comfort and rituals that nurture me. My family of origin (FOO) provided foundational lessons. My families of choice (FOC) are intentional and offer meaningful connections.

I value what I learned from my FOO. They nurtured me with love, boundaries, communication skills, and influence about how the world works. My upbringing was not perfect. At times I did not believe my family understood me. On the other hand, I am grateful for what I learned about frugality, generosity, kindness, and reverence for the natural world.

Today I call several groups my FOC. These families do not supplant the FOO that provided love and safety in both my child and adulthood. These families, however, supplement my world and enable me to continue to grow as my FOO became less central to my life.

My FOCs are active through our commitments to one another. For example, I have a special family that started during my graduate school days. These people provided the essential sustenance I needed to complete my academic work and then maintain productivity and networking throughout my academic career. These friends and mentors, although some have passed away, continue to nourish my wellbeing.

A group of women came into my life when I lived in Madison, Wisconsin over 45 years ago. We have continued to get together in small and large groups over the years. They are the family that I can re-connect with in a matter of minutes upon reuniting. They have been steadfast during times of joy and sadness.

I am part of a FOC in Estes Park who are steadfast in my everyday life. They are also an anchor in celebrating holidays. I know that I can count of them for anything that I need. I hope they feel the same about me. They have enabled me to define family in my own terms.

I have been fortunate to have FOCs come in and out of my life over the years. I cannot imagine what life would be like without the foundational family I was born into as well as the created compassionate families that I have chosen, and that have chosen me.

I am addicted to my Fitbit. Since I began running almost 50 years ago, I have kept track of my mileage manually and know that I have now run/walked over two circumferences of the world. The wearable device, my Fitbit, has been in my life for almost 15 years and I am compulsive about keeping track of not only mileage but the steps I take. I try not to judge myself related to this obsession, but I recognize its importance.

Wearable devices, according to AI, have evolved from specialized tools in the 1970s like calculator watches and medical heart-rate monitors. Today we talk about smartwatches, fitness trackers, and other sensor-embedded devices. The modern wave began in the early 2000s with Bluetooth connectivity. Since 2010 and about the time I began to use technology, wearable devices collected and synchronized personal data.

These wearable devices are useful for health and fitness tracking (e.g., steps, heart rate, sleep, stress), medical monitoring (arrhythmias, glucose levels), and other experiences. As sensors become more accurate, wearables continue to expand from motivating tools to companions for health, productivity, and personalized digital interaction.

I like being able to monitor my health and fitness. It helps me focus on healthy habits and challenges me to stay active, although I think I would be active, as I have been for years, regardless of the notifications.

Although advantages exist, there are drawbacks. For example, wearables collect sensitive personal information that may be vulnerable to breaches or misuse by companies or third parties. Further, wearable sensors are not perfect, and measurements can be inconsistent or inaccurate. I feel I am over-reliant on this technology especially if my Fitbit does not synchronize regularly with my phone. I must remember to regularly charge my watch. These devices can be expensive and may not be available to everyone.

I am happy to have the technology while also recognizing that I can resist my addiction from time to time. I want to be OK if I do not reach my step goal every day. Last week my step count was appreciably down because of the high winds, and I was fine with not trying to battle them. I also recognize that sometimes adjusting my daily goals is important. Nevertheless, I find the device remarkable regarding the information and motivation it gives me.

Christmas overshadows everything this time of year. It isn’t the only reason, however, to appreciate the winter season. I was reminded recently of how people celebrate different holidays and holydays during the month of December. I like knowing what is important to others.

I enjoy Christmas because of the fundamental rejoicing in the birth of Christ as the realm for Christians. The story of the heralded birth provides the basis for music, gift giving, and family traditions. For me as a red letter Christian, the holyday provides light and hope for the future. The message of Jesus’s life is kindness and love.

My Jewish friends celebrate Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights, which commemorates the Maccabees’ victory and the miracle of oil that burned for eight days. These traditions include the lighting of a menorah, eating oil-fried foods like latkes and donuts, playing dreidel, giving gelt (coins), and gift-giving. The annual winter holiday celebrates both events, which resulted in increased religious freedom for the Jewish people. In 2025, Hanukkah started on December 14th.

National Bodhi Day, celebrated by Buddhists, marks Siddhartha Gautama’s enlightenment under the Bodhi tree. For several cultures, celebration occurs on December 8^th. The day commemorates Bohdi’s awakening to the Four Noble Truths: there is suffering, a cause of suffering, an end of suffering, and a way leading to the end of suffering. Celebrants often meditate, study scriptures, light lamps, and perform acts of kindness.

Kwanzaa is an annual celebration of African American cultures from December 26 to January 1. It culminates in a communal feast usually on the sixth day. Activist Maulana Karenga created it based on African harvest festival traditions from various parts of West, East, and Southeast Africa.

The Winter Solstice acknowledges the shortest day and longest night of the year in the Northern Hemisphere. From this day on, daylight will be longer and nights shorter. This festival is celebrated by cultures from around the world. During this December global holiday, each culture marks the holiday with different traditions and rituals, such as brewing and drinking mulled cider, lighting lanterns, dancing, and gift-giving.

I am happy when someone wishes me Happy Holidays because it includes all the possibilities during this season. I am also pleased to be wished a Merry Christmas since that is part of my heritage and tradition. Regardless of the named holiday, all traditions embrace love, light, kindness, and joy. We all share common values and choose to demonstrate them in our own ways, regardless of the religious tradition. It is a time to rejoice in the goodness of the world. Happy Holidays!

I feel resonance when I am outdoors. The earth grounds me and the sun draws me upward. I resound when attuned to something bigger and deeper than myself.

Resonance has been on my mind lately. Scientifically, resonance occurs when something vibrates more strongly because it is driven at a frequency that matches its own natural frequency. Every object has a frequency at which it naturally oscillates. For example, when a musician plays a note, the body of the instrument vibrates and amplifies the tone.

I vibrate with nature. Beyond being scientific, it is a sense of alignment and deep connection with the natural world. It expresses an emotional and spiritual state where I feel attuned with the environment around me.

Being in nature provides an antidote to the chaos that confuses me in this world. Etty Hillesan’s statement resonates with me as she notes, “Despite everything, life is full of beauty and meaning.” When I return from an outdoor Experience, I feel grounded and ready to face the contradictions that dominate my life.

I go to nature to clarify and organize my thoughts. Ideas come to me in my head, and the resonance drops my thoughts from my head to my heart. Although my writing over the years has been mostly in my head, I seek opportunities to express myself from my heart.

I resonate with various aspects of nature. For example, being near an alpine lake can give me a sense of calmness. Reaching a high elevation gives me a feeling of expansion and freedom even as I recognize that I am but a small piece of a huge world. I love seeing wildlife when I am out in nature. I feel a special bond with pikas going about their business of gathering hay for the long winter ahead. I take comfort in seeing a cow elk nuzzling her calf.

I have come to feel a special resonance with the full moon rising. The anticipation of the coming moonlight and the confidence that a moon will rise in all its brilliance, whether cloud obscure it or not, creates a sense of harmony between my inner emotions and the natural world.

Nature is my companion that brings me peace and insight. It reverberates with my heart and soul.

Unlike the old Alfred Hitchcock movie, I am delighted that the birds are regularly back in my life. It only took them two hours to find the buffet feeder after the recent snowstorm. Because of bears and abundant seeds sans snow, I waited until I thought the birds needed me.

I love birds. I am no birder, however, and do not aspire to be. I have tried going out with friends who are avid birders, but I lack patience. I enjoy moving quicker than one should when observing birds. I envy people who can hear bird songs and then look for that bird flitting about.

I took a trip to the Amazon Rain Forest years ago. I did not realize what I was travelling with vehement birders. We went to a remote tourism resort in the heart of the rainforest. To get to this wild place we flew, took a motorboat, and then a wooden canoe. My friends thought they were in bird heaven. I enjoyed the trip and the hours we spent in a lookout tower watching for birds. They identified over 70 new birds to put on their life lists. I wrote them down in case I ever decided to keep such a list, which has not happened.

I miss all the birds that lived year-around in North Carolina. My feeder there was always humming with activity. Fewer birds remain during the winter in Rocky Mountain National Park. Several years ago, friends who were birders spent a week at my condo in Estes. I warned them that not many birds would be found in March. I was wrong. With the thank you note they left, they listed 22 different birds that they had seen. I was delighted for them but also felt less expert on birds.

Unfortunately, I am worried about the birds. Statistics suggest that North America has lost more than 1 in 4 birds in the last 50 years. Habitat loss is the greatest threat to birds. According to research, bird populations in almost every habitat are declining. I lament the losses. I continue to advocate for birds and try to help them as I can.

I have set up two wooden stools near the window so that Gitch can watch the birds with me. They usually disaffect him. I watch them with my own solitude and enjoy my daily chores each winter of filling the feeder and making sure the ground feeders have an opportunity to feast on the mixture of sunflower seeds, millet, peanuts, and corn. Feeding the birds is a winter joy that brings me close to nature when I am indoors.

My students had a final project in my “Women, Work, and Leisure” class at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill. I asked them to interview their mother, grandmother, or another significant adult who was at least a generation older than them. They were to use an interview guide to learn about the individual’s work and leisure life from childhood to the present. They recorded and transcribed the interview. They then applied what they learned to the research and major concepts we had been addressing all semester in the class.

One of the students came into my office to explain why it was not possible for her to interview her mother. She said her mother was hearing impaired and was hard to understand when she spoke. I suggested that the student give the interview a try and if it did not work out, she could interview someone else.

Several days later the student came into my office with tears in her eyes. “I interviewed my mom and then I sat down to transcribe the recording. It was hard to understand but for the first time, I listened and heard what she had to say. I learned so much that I never knew. Thank you for making me do this assignment.”

I was thrilled for the student. As often happens in teaching, I learned an important lesson that day, too. In future visits to my childhood home, I asked my mom questions about her work and leisure over the years. Like my student, I appreciated what I was learning.

My mother passed six years ago. Although I understood more about her childhood and years as an Iowa farmwife and a reading teacher, I wish that I had asked how she felt about her life experiences. I suspect I know the answers to some questions, but I long to have learned more from her before her health deteriorated.

As I get older, I contemplate questions that I now consider in my own life and wish I could ask mom to get her perspective. What would she say were the most important people in her life (sans her family)? What were her happiest moments? When was she the saddest? Who was the biggest influence on her life? What were the most important lessons she learned that might be helpful to me? What was her favorite memory of me? Of my sisters? Of my dad? Of her parents and siblings? What was mom proud of? Is there anything she regrets in her life? How did she feel about growing older and the physical changes that occurred? What were her hopes for her grandchildren, and great grandchildren? What wisdom would she like to pass on to them? How would she like to be remembered?

I know how I remember her, and I am grateful. I would love to talk to her again.

I noted the following statement on a recent fundraising mailing I got from the American Camp Association (ACA): “If parents believe that camp is just about fun rather than growth and youth development, they may simply decide that it isn’t worth investing in.” I do not think the outcomes of camp are an either/or issue. I believe, further, that downplaying fun does a disservice to both kids, their parents, and all adults.

Fun is a feeling of enjoyment, amusement, or lighthearted pleasure that comes from engaging in activities we find interesting and/or playful. It often involves curiosity, spontaneity, laughter, and a sense of freedom.

Camp or any kind of recreational activity should be fun. In this fast-paced age when people of all ages are stressed and worried about the future, fun is necessary. It is not just a luxury. It is not something to squeeze in only after other important outcomes or responsibilities occur. Fun is a vital part of a healthy, balanced lifestyle for children and adults.

Fun for anyone plays a crucial role in reducing stress. When I experience enjoyment, whether taking a walk along Lake Estes, dancing with my boy Gitch, laughing at movies with friends, or playing my trumpet in band, my body releases feel-good chemicals. Fun resets my mental state and offers relief from anxiety.

I have long argued that learning occurs best in fun environments. My philosophy of teaching emphasized that doing activities in the classroom that were fun made learning easier and reinforced important concepts.

Enjoyment also serves as a social glue to strengthen relationships. Any activity that deepens connections with family, friends, cabin mates, and coworkers is good. Shared laughter creates bonds, builds trust, and encourages communication. Fun is critical in cementing positive memories.

Fun, therefore, is not a distraction from a meaningful life. It’s a key part. Fun isn’t optional. It is essential. When people reminisce toward the end of their lives, they do not talk about achievement or survival. They talk about experiences that were fun.

Fun is not easily measured. It is difficult to document. Yet, we know when we are having fun and recognize that it keeps our minds fresh, our hearts light, and relationships strong whether at camp or any aspect of life. Now go out and have some fun!

The 2025 Government Shutdown lasted 44 days. Some people hardly knew it was going on unless they listened to the news. Many people were worried about the holding of SNAP benefits. Furloughed federal employees were often concerned about paying their bills. I found the shutdown personally disconcerting because I could not volunteer at the park.

I proudly say that my second career is volunteering, most specifically at Rocky Mountain National Park. I love the opportunities I have had over the past 10 years to interact with visitors and staff at this beautiful park. During the shutdowns in past years, volunteers were limited in what they could do. People often do not realize the situation, and different parks have handled volunteers in diverse ways.

Volunteers could perform some services offered in the park, but volunteers are not a long-term solution. If volunteers can easily do the work, then perhaps there is no need for paid staff. I vehemently disagree with that assumption.

As someone who has studied the impact of volunteers on recreation organizations over the years, volunteer opportunities clearly do not just happen. Volunteers require supervision and oversight just as most staff require this direction. Volunteers in any organization are meant to supplement the work of paid staff and not supplant them.

Therefore, the shutdown has been trying for me. I felt relief the first few days since I did not have regular 4-5 hour shifts several times a week. I had guests visiting in early October and the park was open. Having the park allowed us to recreate responsibly. I also went to Yosemite National Park in mid-October. Other than visitor centers closed and interpretive programs limited, nothing seemed unusual.

After those first two weeks, however, I felt lost without being able to volunteer. I was forced to clean my house and take a carload of unneeded items to the Thrift Store. I hiked a lot. I did far more doom scrolling on the internet than I should. Gitch and I argued who got to sit in the office chair since I was at home more than normal.

I missed volunteering at the park. I missed social interaction with other volunteers and staff. I missed not knowing what was going on in the park. I missed the chance to feel I was doing something important with my time. The shutdown did not create any dire circumstances for me, but I am delighted that I am back at work!

A family approached the Alpine Visitor Center desk. The man held a card in his hand. “We came into the park on my 4^th grader’s pass” he bragged. “Our family is having a great time.” He then asked me, as the volunteer staffing the desk, questions about where to go next. I was delighted they were enjoying the visit because of the pass.

Every Kid in a Park program began in 2015 as part of the National Park Service centennial. Congress renewed the (renamed) Every Kid Outdoors program through the EXPLORE Act in 2024, authorizing the program for another seven years.

Every Kid Outdoors mobilizes the next generation of stewards by introducing 4th graders to public lands in their backyards and beyond. Statistics indicate that almost every US citizen is within a 2-hour drive of public lands. Research also shows that adults are significantly more likely to return to a national park if they visited with their families as a child. Family outings to parks provide lifelong memories.

I never thought much about parks as a child, but I loved being out in nature. The outdoors was inevitable when growing up on a farm. I have childhood memories of going to the “crick” most days in the summer and playing in the water. My dad got really disgusted when we tried to dam the creek and the cows downstream didn’t have water! Fortunately for the cows, our efforts were usually futile.

Although going to a national park was something done on only one vacation as a child, we made use of our local and state parks frequently for family gatherings. Two of my state park memories are of swimming and hiking at Backbone and my folks coming to Iowa State to visit me and us all going to Ledges State Park for a family picnic.

One website I visit regularly is the Children and Nature Network. It was established shortly after Richard Louv authored his book, Last Child in the Woods. The site states “we believe that the well-being of children and the wild places we love are inextricably linked… today’s kids are less connected to nature than ever before.”

Just like the National Park Service and other public agencies have advocated, the Children and Nature Network supports and mobilizes people to turn the trend of an indoor childhood back outdoors to the benefits of nature.

As the family reminded me at the visitor center this summer, efforts must continue to increase safe and equitable access to the natural world for everyone.