The Chase and Chains of Perfection

Over three decades ago, I was traveling with a group of people to Baja Mexico where we were spending a week living in nature and exploring the meaning of solitude and places/spaces. At a rest stop along the Pacific we took a break from the drive to do a get-acquainted activity. We were asked to find something on the beach that “spoke” to us and describe it to the group. I looked and looked to find a shell that was flawless for the assignment. I came back to the group and apologized that most shells were damaged, and I couldn’t find what resonated with me. One of the participants asked, “Why does it have to be perfect?” That question started the pursuit of why perfection was so important to me. How was striving for perfection effecting my life?

My father was a perfectionist. He went to great lengths to get things exactly right. My mother was somewhat the opposite. She wanted to get things done efficiently and that trumped perfection for her. I needed to be both perfect and productive. How did I compromise those expectations? And how did I do it in a way that did not coopt my values or alienate others?

Since retirement, I feel less pressure to be professionally perfect, but still struggle with it personally. I do not like the stress and anxiety of pursuing perfection and am learning to adapt. For example, when I write I want to produce the perfect sentence. I have realized over time to just get the ideas down initially and then strive for excellence as I edit. If I wanted to write perfectly the first time, I would never write anything. Perfectionism leads to procrastination and overthinking.

Voltaire advocated, “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of good.” I have tried to abide by this idea. I refuse, however, to believe that “good enough” is OK. Doing the best I can do has become more important than the pursuit of perfection.

As I eventually learned from that sandy beach years ago, “a beautiful thing is never perfect” as the Egyptian proverb goes. Pursuing excellence and finding balance is helping me lead a more contented life.