Resilience and the Strength Within

My mom used to say to me when I was upset about something as a child that, “This, too, shall pass.” I am not sure if that was the best advice sometimes, but it was a way to move away from obsessive thinking. Today I see the phrase as a precursor to what resilience means for me.

I wrote recently about how trees adapt to climate change–resistance, resiliency, and transition. Being resilient related to withstanding and/or recovering from difficult situations struck a chord for me.

Resilient people know that even when things are problematic, they can keep going until they make it through. Instead of despairing or hiding using unhealthy coping strategies, resilient people face life’s demands head-on. One of the concepts that youth development research frequently addresses is related to how to help kids be resilient. Children often face difficult situations that they have little control over, and yet with support, they can persevere and thrive.

I see this tree when I walk around Lake Estes and it reminds me of resilience.

I know people whom I admire for their resilience. Individuals have overcome illnesses to recover to a healthy life. Others have lost significant others both early and later in life and have managed to continue and find ways to be happy.

I feel fortunate to have not faced the catastrophes that others have experienced. The most challenging time for me was when I was denied tenure at the University of Wisconsin. I seriously contemplated leaving higher education and doing something else unknown at the time. I continued, however, into the career that I had desired as an educator and researcher. I was able to thrive beyond that setback. I am grateful that I was resilient.

Emotional resilience also involves regulating emotions during times of stress. Resilient people can calm their mind and manage their emotions when they are dealing with negative experiences. Even with unimaginable circumstances, resilience allows people to not just survive but prosper. I strive to be one of those people who have purpose, a social network, problem-solving skills, optimism, and the ability to act.

Doing Nothing and Intentional Being

I don’t know what “doing thing” means. I have a terrible time doing nothing. My upbringing valued hard work. Retirement offers a reprieve from busyness and labor that I have yet to experience.

The Protestant work ethic, a concept popularized by sociologist Max Weber, is the belief that hard work, discipline, and frugality are morally virtuous and lead to success. It suggests that diligence and worldly success are signs of divine favor. This ethic played a key role in shaping my individual responsibility. I was indoctrinated by the ideas. I feel best when I have a full schedule and a moderate “to do” list. Yet, I also recognize that doing nothing could and perhaps, should, be a daily habit.

To “do nothing” has varied meanings. At its simplest, it refers to a state of inactivity—refraining from work, movement, or deliberate action. It may mean a lack of physical or mental effort such as resting or relaxing, simply sitting, lying down, or engaging in mindless activities like staring out a window. It can be effortless action rather than forcing outcomes.

Further, philosophically, “doing nothing” can also be an intentional act such as meditation, reflection, or simply allowing events to unfold without interference. Buddhists suggest that non-action allows for a sense of observing thoughts without reacting to them, which can be peaceful.

It’s easy to get caught up in the “doing” of life and not simply “being.” Yet, I long to rest, recover, and allow myself to be unproductive without guilt. Although hard to implement, I have committed myself to do “nothing” periodically. That desire comes from the privilege I have due to limited caregiving responsibilities and financial stability. Therefore, I ought to be able to consciously do nothing, hang loose, and enjoy rather than feel guilty about that time spent on what appears to be unproductive.

I am learning that doing nothing might look like idleness, but it can be a conscious way of engaging with life, avoiding unnecessary struggle, and focusing on deep reflection. I need that right now. After 75 years, that approach is not easy, but intentional inaction from time to time is worth considering.

Yin Yang and the World of Contrasts

The older I get, the more I recognize how complicated the world is. I am partial to the Chinese philosophy of yin and yang that describes the dualistic nature of the universe as well as the substantial relationships. It represents the idea that opposite forces are interconnected, interdependent, and constantly in flux.

Yin is typically associated with qualities such as darkness, passivity, femininity, and the moon, while Yang represents light, activity, masculinity, and the sun. Rather than being absolute opposites, Yin and Yang complement each other. They balance to create harmony in nature, human life, and the cosmos. The symbol of Yin and Yang, the Taijitu, illustrates this balance with swirling black (Yin) and white (Yang) sections, each containing a dot of the opposite color, signifying that within each force lies a seed of the other.

Similarly, the notion of “both/and” rather than “either/or” is a personal and professional philosophy of mine. Rather than focus on hyperbole, I acknowledge that like yin and yang, ideas can complement each other.

I was reminded of the yin and yang on my recent vacation. Although being away from home is a contrast to daily activities, I cannot help but think about both as I travel. I love being away and then I love being back home.

The yin and yang also remind me of other contrasts in my world. For example, I love the outdoors and the differing experiences I have with landscapes. I see order and chaos, solitude and community, and cacophony and harmony. Recognizing these differences is a way to realize the richness of where I live, as well as the larger world.

I am seeing the yin and yang, the “both/and” as I remember by dear sweet cat, Mog. I mourn her loss but smile as I remember our days together. To dwell on only one emotion is to miss the value of contrasts—happiness for 15 years with her, and sadness because she is no longer physically with me.

Contradictory to yin yang is the amount of hyperbole I experience every day. I am tired of hearing exaggerated statements or claims about things being the greatest or the best. It reminds me that life is not meant to be lived in exaggerations or in statements that are dichotomously right or wrong. Yin yang helps me understand my emotions in this complex world.

In Loving Memory of Mog

Mog Henderson, 15 (74 cat years), passed away suddenly at her home in Estes Park, Colorado on May 7, 2025. She waited for her mom to return home from a trip, enjoyed a few pats on the head, and then collapsed and died.

Mog was born in 2010 in rural North Carolina. She was a mini-me of her mother who was a brown tabby just like her. She had two sisters and a brother. Gitch Henderson was adopted at the same time as her. Nothing is known about the rest of the biological family.

Mog lived in North Carolina for 4 years before moving to Colorado when her adopted mom, Karla, retired. She led a normal indoor cat life longing to be outdoors but content to be safe inside with a cool breeze on her face and a warm sunny spot for sleeping during the daytime.

Mog was an independent cat and loyal companion to her mom. More than that, she was a daughter, sister, comforter, purring machine, sometimes writer, critical editor, snoozer, and cuddler. Mog was curious, agile, gentle, and affectionate. She was never aggressive to anyone (except her brother on occasion). She had beautiful big green eyes that were expressive and looked into her mom’s soul.

Mog was a lifelong supporter of her mom. She provided joy in her stately but quiet affection. She was a sounding board for ideas that mom verbalized. She loved to see her mom laugh and was by her side when things were not going so well. She endured her adoptive mom’s tirades about concerns in her life.

No memorial service will be held. Friends and family can give their darlings extra pets today and every day of their lives as the end can come quickly. Mog awaits at the end of the rainbow bridge for her mom and siblings to come and claim her again. In the meantime, she will frolic, meet new friends, and keep a constant eye on her mom, brother, and friends in Estes Park, North Carolina, and elsewhere.

Embracing the Before and After of Recreation Activities

Only three more sleeps until I am on my way. I am about to embark on a hiking trip in England. We have been planning for months. I look forward to getting away and to enjoying beautiful landscapes (and baby lambs) with old and new friends. As my professional and personal musings demonstrate, I appreciate the breadth of what people call the multiphasic recreation experience.

As a recreation professor trying to inspire students to facilitate activities for a diversity of community participants, I have emphasized that an experience is more than just the actual activity. The whole experience relates to a spectrum–the anticipation of the event, the preparation for a positive experience, travelling to and from, the actual activity, and the memories of the activity. Without those elements, the time spent during an endeavor may not be the same.

Since September, we have planned and consulted each other about the steps needed to prepare. Having others to share anticipation with as well as making sure all are adequately ready is important. I love counting down the “sleeps.”

Last fall I had a grand experience on a trip to Patagonia. Things went mostly according to plans, we had fun, and everyone stayed healthy. We could not have asked for a better trip. Moreover, my travelling friends continue to connect via social media and are planning a reunion this fall. Our recreation experience continues even though the Patagonia activity concluded five months ago.

One aspect that concerns me about people who experience memory issues such as dementia is the inability to fully appreciate the phases of the recreation experience. Looking forward to an event is part of the excitement. A friend of mine does not tell her aging mother about upcoming events because the mother will not remember. This situation is sad. Having something to look forward to is important. I also know that not being able to recall a major activity diminishes its importance. Although I seldom look back on previous entries to my daily journals, I know I can jar those memories if the details start to fade.

Having a remarkable recreation experience depends on many factors. I look forward to the entire spectrum as I embark on my upcoming trip. Anticipation and recollection are essential for a life well experienced.

More Lessons from Trees: Resistance, Resilience, and Transition

Trees are a beloved natural resource as I learn more about them. I took trees for granted when I lived in North Carolina and sometimes resented the way they made it difficult to see the wide-open skies. Trees growing in Colorado have become a focus of my outdoor consciousness.

A recent program sponsored by the Estes Valley Watershed Coalition highlighted the future of trees. Research is conducted throughout the US to determine how trees are adjusting to climate change related to temperature warming as well as the result of wildfires.

The essence of the presentation was that populations of trees may go through three stages: resistance, resiliency, and transition. As I listened to the research report, I began to think that those stages also pertain to me as I contemplate aging and change in my life.

Many trees resist the changes occurring in their environment. Likewise, resistance is a common human response to changing environments. Change is good, but often not easy. I hate to be one of those people who talk about “the good old days” but I now understand how easy it is to fall into that trap. I want to resist the fact that my 75-year-old body is just not as good as it was when I was 35, or even when I was 65. Resistance, however, beats giving in.

Since resistance isn’t working for me, resilience has become a new mantra. Resilience is the ability to recover from or adjust to misfortune or change. Trees, as well as resilient people, know that even when things are difficult, they can keep going until they make it through. It takes time and intentionality. Mother Nature takes care of trees, and I am learning the importance of the core components of resilience including connections and positive thinking. My hiking is no longer as fast or as far, and I am adapting to those changes.

Transition is the third stage noted about trees. They thrive by adapting to new circumstances through a period of changing from one condition to another. Trees may find that they are better adapted to higher elevations, for example. Humans may find themselves in new environments such as moving from a single home to another living situation. When the time comes, transitions may be necessary. I hope, however, that I will continue to be active in some way even if it is different than my current routine.

 I recognize that circumstances evolve over time. I hope I can live in the moment, enjoying trees, as well as preparing myself for changes in my future.

Geese as an Exemplar for Living

As a young person, I loved hearing the deep-throated honking while looking up into the eastern Iowa skies to see V-shaped flocks of Canada geese flying either to the north in the spring or to the south in the fall. I do not recall that they ever landed nearby so I had no up-close association with geese until I moved to Estes Park ten years ago.

A resident group of geese stays year around at Lake Estes. The lake seldom freezes. Although usually migratory, geese in Estes Park stay due to food sources and milder winter conditions. During harsh winters, they may migrate to lower altitudes but that is not usually the case. I go to the lake almost every day to see what the geese are doing.

The geese in Estes Park graze on grassy areas, especially near the golf course and Lake Estes. They are social and congregate in flocks for safety. They nest near bodies of water to protect their babies from predators. Geese are vocal and honk to maintain contact with their flock, signal danger, and/or coordinate movements.

I heard a metaphor about geese in their migratory flights years ago and remember it as I observe the resident geese. The story goes that geese fly in V-formation because it creates an uplift for the birds following behind. This configuration improves their flying efficiency and suggests that teamwork and collaboration lead to greater results.

In addition, the flying geese rotate leadership. When the lead goose gets tired, it swaps back into the formation. Another goose takes its place. Shared leadership and trusting others to lead is evident. The geese in the back are part of the team as they honk to encourage those in front to maintain their speed and direction.

Finally, geese provide a means for support in adversity. If a goose becomes sick or injured and falls out of formation, two other geese will stay behind to help and protect it. They remain with their companion until it recovers or passes away. What a great lesson to learn regarding the importance of loyalty and mutual care in our lives.

I am grateful for the Estes Park geese. I am heartened by the lessons geese are teaching me about collaboration, support, steadfastness, empathy, caring, and resilience.

My Entangled World with Animals

I love animals. They bring joy to me whether they are domestic or wild, or a combination of those characteristics. In 2024 the World Leisure Journal published a special issue entitled, “Unstructured Entanglements of Human Leisure and Nonhuman Animal Life.” I found these submissions intriguing.

The studies centralize humans and speak to the thousands of nonhuman species that live alongside humans. Animals can provide pleasure, enjoyment, and happiness as well as fear and trepidation. Animals and humans are linked whether they are domestic pets or wild animals that foster joy and respect.

Domestic pets such as cats, dogs, and other species interact with humans daily. I will not expound on the importance of those relationships since folks have their firsthand experiences. I have described my love for my kitties in previous blogs. Anyone who has a pet recognizes the comfort they provide as well as the sadness when they cross the rainbow bridge to wait for us.

Growing up on a farm, I loved the animals we raised. I acknowledged their utility to our livelihood. My dad treated them with profound respect. They had an economic purpose in life that I took for granted. They were not pets but provided an essential commitment and reverence as they lived and died. I do not eat much red meat these days, but when I do, I consciously thank those animals that now become a part of my body and remember how my dad cherished his caretaking of our animals.

I enjoy the daily interaction I have with animals in the wild. I never get tired of seeing the deer fawns or the elk calves. I get excited when I see a pine marten or snowshoe hare crossing the trail in front of me. I love the monthly opportunities I have as a citizen scientist to count elk in the park. I am in awe of these wild animals in my life.

Animal-human encounters, however, are not always positive. I often get asked in the park about bears and mountain lions. People share their fears. The reality is that you are lucky to see either of them. I have been hiking in this park for over 55 years and have only encountered a handful of black bears and have never seen a mountain lion. I remind people that the most dangerous animals in the park are a moose (they are very moody) and/or a mother elk protecting her baby.

I adopt a multispecies perspective on all the relationships I have with animals. Those associations occur everyday. I am grateful for the interactions with pets as well as “wild” animals.

I Get to Live Here

This period marks 5 years since the COVID emergency occurred. Like everyone else, I found the pandemic highly unsettling. Nevertheless, I had my cats, computer, and jigsaw puzzles during this lonely time. I also had the outdoors and daily sojourns into those environments, which saved me. I survived because nature did not have COVID.

Similarly, I feel I am living in another emergency now with the inhumane ways that our government is treating people in our country as well as globally. I am distressed daily by the news I hear. In the same way as five years ago, however, I head outdoors to find peace each day.

I know how lucky I am to live where I do. I have heard more than one local person remark that “at least we live in this beautiful place.” I am privileged to live here since the Estes Valley is not an affordable place for everyone. Getting to view the mountains every day and gather strength from them is priceless.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The world is full of beautiful places. For example, whenever I return to Iowa, I marvel at how verdant the outdoor landscapes are. I grew up in the Wapsipinicon watershed and although I often did not appreciate it as a youth, I got my love for the outdoors as I rambled in that area. Awe-inspiring opportunities occur in micro as well as macro environments.

I seek the outdoors when I want to rejuvenate my soul. Watching geese on Lake Estes delights me as they land and surf on the water. Tracks in new snow remind me of the world that is busy even as I sleep. The sight of the first bluebird of spring gives me joy. The recognition of the call of the red-winged blackbirds staking out their territory reminds me also of the Iowa environment of my youth.

I often write about the outdoors. It is my passion. Viewing the mountains from my house or walking up a park drainage area provides a “joy” snack for me. The outdoors is strength in challenging times. I am thankful for breath-taking landscapes and evidence of abundant wildlife to heal my heart from the traumas of the outside world. I get to live here!

This Month is Our Birthday

Mom says that Gitch and I will turn 15 hooman years old this month. That is equivalent to 76 cat years—slightly older than mom! She doesn’t know if March 23 is the exact day we were born since our biological mom wandered into a rural North Carolina garage and gave birth to us. Our adopted mom, Karla, chose the day because it was the day her first great niece was born. Regardless, we know we are getting older.

Karla says life is a matter of timing. Timing was the case for Gitch and me. Mom’s rabbit had just passed over the rainbow bridge with her two previous kitties all in one year. She was missing another breathing being in her house. A friend heard from a friend who heard from a friend, that four 6-week-old kittens were looking for homes. The photos showed a tabby female, a gray male, and two calico sisters.

Of course, I am biased since I am a brown tabby, but mom was partial to my markings. When she saw the photo, she knew she had to have me. She drove 1 ½ hours to pick me up. That first night with her was horrible. I missed my cat mom and siblings. Karla let me sleep with her and I settled down, but it was hard. The next day she had a long day at work. I was terribly lonely and scared.

That second night she decided having a single kitten was not a good idea. She called and then drove the 1 ½ hours again and picked up my brother, Gitch. When she chose me two days before, I could tell Gitch was disappointed. I was ecstatic when we were reunited and both of us could now cuddle and play together.

We moved from North Carolina to Colorado when we were 4 years old. It was a good move since all three of us were together. We are indoor cats, and I regret that sometimes. Going outside would be nice. On the other hand, the outdoors is scary with coyotes, bobcats, owls, and hawks in our backyard. We are safe inside.

We are lucky to have mom as our guardian. By the way she hugs and kisses us, I know she is happy to be our servant. As we age, both Gitch and I have health issues, but we are getting good medications and a nutritious diet. I hope we all live for a long time. Although I prefer to often be aloof, I know how good our lives are with our liberal cat lady mom. Happy birthday to us!